I lost my mother 3 years ago today. She had lived a long life. I was prepared. Or so I thought. Until she was gone and I realized you are never, ever prepared to lose your mother. It leaves a hole in your heart that you are never able to fill.

I still miss her. There were so many wonderful things about my mom. Back when I was a kid, she was a working woman when women weren’t generally out in the work force. All my friends’ moms were stay at home moms–the kind that drove them to school and were there when they came home from school. My mother wasn’t because we didn’t have money and to make ends meet my mother had a full time job.

I learned about being a working mother from my mother. I learned about juggling a family and a full time job from my mother. I learned about work ethic and sacrifice from my mother. I learned about putting food on the table and getting the laundry folded and making sure the kids got their homework done and then dragging your ass out of bed to get to work on time from my mother. I learned how not to make excuses from my mother.

I learned from my mother that if you want something in life you have to go out and get it for yourself because no one is going to hand it to you.

I learned about unconditional love from my mother. I learned there is nothing so bad, nothing I can screw up, no mistake I can make that would make my mother love me less. My mother also taught me that I have to own my mistakes and learn from them, that I have to stand and be accountable.

I learned that there is nothing as warm and as comforting as a mother’s love, nothing that will heal you more when you’re hurting. And there is no one who will share your joys and sorrows more than your mother. No one will listen more to you when you need an ear, who will tell you when you’re wrong, who will guide you when you need it, who will thrill to your triumphs and cry when you’re hurt than your mother.

My mother held my hand through childhood, let me lean on her when I needed to, pushed me to become an adult, and let me go when it was my time to fly.

And when it was her time, I let her go, too.

I miss you, Mom.

College Football talk commencing. Those whose eyes glaze over at such conversation feel free to look away.

Watched the First Round of the NFL Draft last night, mainly for this:

Sam Bradford, Oklahoma’s Heisman Trophy winning quarterback, was drafted #1 by the St. Louis Rams last night.

Woot!

Also:

Ndamukong Suh from Nebraska went #2 to Detroit

Gerald McCoy from Oklahoma went #3 to Tampa Bay (He cried and made me get all weepy too!)

Trent Williams from Oklahoma went #4 to Washington

Russell Okung from Oklahoma State went #6 to Seattle

Jermaine Gresham from Oklahoma went #21 to Cincinnati

Dez Bryant from Oklahoma State went #24 to Dallas

The Big 12 had a mighty fine showing in the first round. I can’t wait to watch them all play.

:glee:

Oh where should I start? (Spoilers ahead. If you haven’t caught up to your DVR yet, look away now!)

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Amazing Race – Caite U turned Brandy and Carol because they were mean to her? Yeah, there’s a smart strategic move for ya. *eyeroll*. Then again, using *smart* and *Caite* in the same sentence? I’ll leave it at that. Smart would have been to Uturn players like Louie & Michael who have been consistently leading the pack. But then again, Louie and Michael didn’t exactly come in first last week anyway, so who knows? Maybe Caite did make a good move because Brandy and Carol have been coming in at the front end of the groups every week. Though I won’t be sad to see the cranky duo gone, especially Brandy, who was often very mean to her partner. Still rooting for Jet & Cord, though I do like Michael and Louie too.

America’s Next Top Model – The shrieking, oh the shrieking! Make it stop! This season has been all about the catty bitchiness, yes? I don’t think I’ve ever seen models exercise their lungs as much as this season. The drama between the women is way more entertaining than any of the modeling. In fact, I don’t even remember any of the modeling they’ve been doing. Just the shrieking. Oy. Again, not sure who I’m rooting for. I just want the screaming to stop.

Project Runway – Was fun to see Tim stop off at everyone’s homes, see their families, and get a peek at all the designs they’re working on for Bryant Park. Was sad to see Jay go. He had such high hopes and so did his family, plus I’m not a huge Milla fan. Am really looking forward to the finale next week to see everyone’s collections! Not sure who I’m rooting for. I really like both Emilio and Seth Aaron.

Survivor – JT, JT, JT. You played so brilliantly in your winning season. Last night, though? Dumbest. Move. Ever. I wonder sometimes if they lose brain cells in the jungle. Yeah, let’s give Russell even more power than he already thinks he has. I’m just going to sit back and root for Parvati now since she’s the only one not kissing Russell’s ass at this point. :gah:

Still not watching American Idol. Still don’t care. Still not missing it. Though I heard Adam Lambert was good as a mentor. I watched his performance on Youtube. Stellar.

Glee’s back! I love Glee. Missed it while it was gone for however many freakin months it was gone, but it was a long time. Sue’s Vogue at the end? Freakin’ awesome. And the addition of Jonathan Groff as Rachel’s new love interest? Yummy. And Idina Menzel? Squee! Can’t wait for Madonna week next week.

CSI – Loved CSI last night. Love the budding romance between Hodges and Simms. Loved Hodges and Simms playing wanna be CSIs and the kids being able to teach them about loving the lab. Thought the episode was great.

So how was your tv week?