The five workshops posted on this blog are the complete Anatomy of Sex Scenes workshop. Now it’s Q&A time, so if writers, or readers, have any questions about sex scenes, feel free to post them here or within any of the individual workshop blog posts and I’ll do my best to answer.
Now for prizes. I’ll be drawing prizes from the comments posted at all five workshops, plus here. 3 Winners will be drawn at random. Prizes will be:
THE COMPLETE IDIOT’S GUIDE TO WRITING EROTIC ROMANCE by Alison Kent - This is an awesome writer’s tool, and really, it contains way more information than just for writing erotic romance. It’s a great all around writing guideline, and a tool you can use no matter what kind of love scenes you intend to write.
A $15 Gift Certificate from Amazon. So you can go buy great books with rockin sex scenes. 
An autographed copy of any book from my backlist. Your choice. There’s sex in all of them. Heh.
I’ll draw a winner on Monday. Thanks to everyone who stopped by!
This was such a great workshop! I am so glad I participated in it, I learned so much. I wonder how you decide whether to write sensual love scenes or erotica. I know erotica is hot right now, but I don’t know if I would feel comfortable using the language I’ve seen in some. What are your thoughts on this?
by Margay August 1st, 2008 at 9:09 amLoved all the workshops - sadly it was a crazy week for me
and I shouldn’t be trolling blogs now… but I loved it! I’m going to have to go back and check for ones I missed. Thanks for having them, Jaci - they were great.
by limecello August 1st, 2008 at 10:58 amgreat adivce from all teh workshops, good to know these things from authors
by kim h August 1st, 2008 at 1:18 pmwould u go back and change any of your sex scene, if you can think of one. favorite sex scene from a movie?
by kim h August 1st, 2008 at 1:22 pmThank you! Great information, enjoyed all the lessons!
by Rhonda August 1st, 2008 at 2:37 pmThank you for taking the time to do these workshops, they were a lot of fun to read and learn from.
Take care and have a great weekend.
by Shannon August 1st, 2008 at 4:55 pmThis is going to sound kind of dumb, but the hardest thing for me when it comes to love scenes is…getting body parts to be in the right place at the right time. What I mean by that is, how do you go about getting everything in the right place at the right moment?
Here’s an example. I was working on my WIP the other day and my characters just decided that it was time to have sex. Yay! However, once I finished writing the scene, it was like an anatomy lesson. So, how do I go about adding the sexiness to it all?
Help???
by Kaitlin August 1st, 2008 at 11:08 pm*sigh* Never mind. I just read Part 5. That’s what I get for jumping ahead. LOL!
But I still have a hard time getting sex down right on paper. I’m a big fan of hot sex, but…I dunno. Maybe my characters weren’t as ready as they thought? :-P
Kaitlin’s last blog post..La-li-la-li-la
by Kaitlin August 1st, 2008 at 11:15 pmNot dumb at all Kaitlin. Writing a love scene is a lot like being a choreographer. You have to make sure every body part flows smoothly, make sure nothing is stilted or awkward (and that no one has 3 arms
)
I usually close my eyes and envision the scene from start to finish, the flow and movement of each characters body. It takes awhile, but you get to the point where you can visualize what each person is doing. It’s hard, but doable. You almost have to crawl into that scene with them, get right next to them, see the scene from each character’s eyes to be sure you’re getting the choreography right. Then layer in the emotion and the senses, their reactions, what they feel, taste, see, etc.
Not easy, I know. But I tend to take love scenes very slowly to make sure I get them right. It takes me longer to write a love scene in a book than any other part, mainly because I slow down every bit of the action and visualize it in my mind so I don’t make it stilted or anatomical. There are so many layers to a sex scene. Take your time!
by Jaci August 2nd, 2008 at 6:43 amKim - would I go back and change any of my sex scenes? No. I wrote each of them for a specific reason for those specific characters, so I wouldn’t change a single one.
Favorite sex scene in a movie? Ooooh there’s so many. I loved the sex scene after the fight scene in Mr. and Mrs. Smith. So powerful, all that adrenline rushing, followed by the sex. So much emotion in that scene. Yumm.
by Jaci August 2nd, 2008 at 6:45 amMargay - I think you have to write using the language you’re most comfortable using. And there are varying levels of romance being published out there, from sensual, to hot and spicy, to erotic romance to straight out erotica. All of them use different language, too, depending on the publisher. Read within the different publishers, find out who’s publishing what you’re comfortable writing, and target those publishers. While I think authors should always push themselves to grow, I don’t think you should ever make yourself do something you’re not comfortable doing, because it’ll show in your writing. And you can write a really hot and spicy romance without using graphic language. :cheese:
by Jaci August 2nd, 2008 at 6:47 amJaci, that is great advice. Another thing I’ve noticed - and you even mentioned it here - is the terms erotica and erotic romance. What, exactly, is the difference between the two? How do you distinguish one from the other?
by Margay August 2nd, 2008 at 6:53 amThis has been a great workshop and I know I will be referring back to it. My problem is maintaining the sexual tension and not allowing the characters to jump into bed too soon, but characters will do exactly what they want. But it’s all fun! Thanks for the great information, Jaci.
by Diane August 2nd, 2008 at 7:17 amJaci:
I too have found this workshop so informative and helpful.
If you open your book with an erotic dream sequence between your heroine and her previous or fantasy lover and she is left unfulfilled and wanting as a result of the events of the dream, is that acceptable? There would be no build up of sexual tension, but it would give the reader some insight into the heroine, her desires etc. But then again, if the first paragraph in the book is a love scene, would that be a turn off for your reader?
Margay’s question with respect to the difference between erotic romance and erotica is a really good one that I would like to echo…
You must be starting the countdown to your vacation Jaci!
Thanks again
by Lea August 2nd, 2008 at 8:00 amLea
Another thing I’ve noticed - and you even mentioned it here - is the terms erotica and erotic romance. What, exactly, is the difference between the two? How do you distinguish one from the other?
Well, here’s my opinion. Others opnions of the differences may vary.
Erotica is, to make it simple–sex for pure enjoyment. It can take many forms, but it’s written as sex without the necessity of a forming relationship or romance. For example, an erotica story might be one woman’s journey to find sexual fulfillment by trying out different sexual partners, and her joy in expressing herself sexually but never committing to a relationship with just one man.
Erotic romance contains explicit sex scenes but also has a core romance (however you set up said romance) and a happily ever after. For example, a man and woman who enter into a relationship whereby the author shows the sexual journey of the couple explicity, the couple have a romance, fall in love, and at the end of the book end up committed to each other in some way. Voila, you have a core romance. Even a menage story can be an erotic romance. As long as there’s a romance in the book, in my opinion it’s erotic romance. If it’s just sex with no core romance, then to me it’s erotica.
The two terms are often used interchangeably in this industry, but I disagree in a lot of ways how it’s used. I write erotic romance, not erotica. There’s always a romance in my books. Always a happily ever after for my characters.
Confusing, huh?
by Jaci August 2nd, 2008 at 8:42 amIf you open your book with an erotic dream sequence between your heroine and her previous or fantasy lover and she is left unfulfilled and wanting as a result of the events of the dream, is that acceptable?
I’ve actually done this before, Lea. I think it works great. Sets the tone for the story and how one character feels about another. I did this in a ‘daydream’ kind of sequence in the first chapter of RIDING WILD.
I don’t think it’s a turnoff at all. I’ve read similar type sequences before, and if done right, can really set the mood and tone well.
by Jaci August 2nd, 2008 at 8:46 amThanks Jaci;
I’ve read erotic dream/daydream sequences in books before too. I just wasn’t too sure about opening a book with that type a scenario when the reader had not been introduced to the main characters per se. Your reassurance is appreciated.
Also your clarification with regard to erotica and erotic romance isn’t confusing at all! It actually makes perfect sense…
Lea
by Lea August 2nd, 2008 at 8:55 amI love taking workshops and loved this past week with all the blogs. Sorry I didn’t have time to comment more.
You had a great topic. Thanks for all your insight.
by Beth C. August 2nd, 2008 at 6:06 pmThanks for sharing your ideas. This is the first time I’ve had a workshop on writing sex scenes and it was really helpful. One question though - how do you deal with the vocabulary? I mean, how do you decide which is the best word to describe the various body parts without being:
a) crude
b) a ninny
c) repetitive
I find it hard to strike a balance between the three.
by Dawn August 3rd, 2008 at 3:10 am:teeter:
Can’t resist your icons.
Jaci, thank you so much for this workshop! I love the way you write sex scenes. The advice you have given will help me to write a better scenes.
Stephanie S.’s last blog post..Why Oh Why?
by Stephanie S. August 3rd, 2008 at 7:55 pmyep that was nice, hot thx
by kh August 4th, 2008 at 7:22 pm[...] 8. The Anatomy Of Sex Scenes by Jaci Burton — “Writing sex can sometimes be the most uncomfortable part of writing the book. But it doesn’t have to be. A few key pointers that may help charge up your sex scenes and drag the writer out of their ‘discomfort’ zone.” Part One - Part Two - Part Three - Part Four - Part Five - Q&A [...]
by Thursday Thirteen: LB&LI « Impulsive Hearts August 6th, 2008 at 2:37 pm