Jaci Burton’s Muse

I lost my mother 3 years ago today. She had lived a long life. I was prepared. Or so I thought. Until she was gone and I realized you are never, ever prepared to lose your mother. It leaves a hole in your heart that you are never able to fill.

I still miss her. There were so many wonderful things about my mom. Back when I was a kid, she was a working woman when women weren’t generally out in the work force. All my friends’ moms were stay at home moms–the kind that drove them to school and were there when they came home from school. My mother wasn’t because we didn’t have money and to make ends meet my mother had a full time job.

I learned about being a working mother from my mother. I learned about juggling a family and a full time job from my mother. I learned about work ethic and sacrifice from my mother. I learned about putting food on the table and getting the laundry folded and making sure the kids got their homework done and then dragging your ass out of bed to get to work on time from my mother. I learned how not to make excuses from my mother.

I learned from my mother that if you want something in life you have to go out and get it for yourself because no one is going to hand it to you.

I learned about unconditional love from my mother. I learned there is nothing so bad, nothing I can screw up, no mistake I can make that would make my mother love me less. My mother also taught me that I have to own my mistakes and learn from them, that I have to stand and be accountable.

I learned that there is nothing as warm and as comforting as a mother’s love, nothing that will heal you more when you’re hurting. And there is no one who will share your joys and sorrows more than your mother. No one will listen more to you when you need an ear, who will tell you when you’re wrong, who will guide you when you need it, who will thrill to your triumphs and cry when you’re hurt than your mother.

My mother held my hand through childhood, let me lean on her when I needed to, pushed me to become an adult, and let me go when it was my time to fly.

And when it was her time, I let her go, too.

I miss you, Mom.

College Football talk commencing. Those whose eyes glaze over at such conversation feel free to look away.

Watched the First Round of the NFL Draft last night, mainly for this:

Sam Bradford, Oklahoma’s Heisman Trophy winning quarterback, was drafted #1 by the St. Louis Rams last night.

Woot!

Also:

Ndamukong Suh from Nebraska went #2 to Detroit

Gerald McCoy from Oklahoma went #3 to Tampa Bay (He cried and made me get all weepy too!)

Trent Williams from Oklahoma went #4 to Washington

Russell Okung from Oklahoma State went #6 to Seattle

Jermaine Gresham from Oklahoma went #21 to Cincinnati

Dez Bryant from Oklahoma State went #24 to Dallas

The Big 12 had a mighty fine showing in the first round. I can’t wait to watch them all play.

THE PERFECT PLAY went off to my editor yesterday. That book was so much fun to write. And so easy. It was like it wrote itself, the words just tumbling out from my brain to my fingers. Ahhhhhh, I love books like that. Because books like that are rare.

THE PERFECT GAME, the one I’m writing now? Not so easy. You’d think as the followup book to THE PERFECT PLAY, it would be just as easy. Ha. This one is a giant pain in my ass. Every word, every scene, every chapter is like painful labor, hour upon hour of sweat and tears with very little result, where you know you’re working hard to push out that baby but you’re just. not. getting. anywhere.

Sounds fun doesn’t it?

But some books are like that. Some books just seem to write themselves, whereas others are miserable every step of the way. And there’s no explanation as to why. It’s not that the characters aren’t awesome, because they are. God I love these characters so much, and I’m having fun with their story. It’s just not coming to me as easily as the last book did.

Like I said, some books are just like that. It’s as if each book is a child. They have their own unique personalities. Some are sweet and easy, and some are petulant and difficult. And how do you handle the difficult as a writer? You just sit your ass down at the computer and write every single day until the damn book is done. And when it’s done you love each baby you’ve given birth to equally, no matter how difficult the labor was.

Some labors are just harder than others. But the end result is worth it.

And so goes my April so far.

Thanks so much to everyone who participated in the contest!

I used random.org to select the three winners, and they are:

Ambercat_13 (comment #2)

Chelsea B (Comment #26)

Booklover1335 (Comment #49)

Congrats to the winners and thanks again to everyone for playing! Winners, I’ll be emailing you shortly for your details so I can get the books to you.

PLEASE NOTE THE CONTEST IS NOW CLOSED AND WINNERS HAVE BEEN CHOSEN. THANKS TO ALL WHO PARTICIPATED!

I received awesome news today! RIDING ON INSTINCT, the third book in my Wild Riders series, is a finalist in the NATIONAL READERS CHOICE AWARDS!!

I’m so stoked about this because last year RIDING TEMPTATION was a finalist in the NRCA, which means this is my second year as a finalist, and for the same series. How cool is that? (Huge thanks to the NRCA for this honor!)

So whenever I get happy news I like to share the love, and I thought, hey, maybe there are people out there who haven’t read this series yet, or haven’t read all 3 books in the series so far, and would like to.

After all, there are 2 more books coming out this year, and y’all should catch up, right?

So how about a giveaway of an autographed copy of one of the Wild Riders books, winner’s choice? I mean, even if you already read the book, your copy might not be autographed, right? Or maybe you read a digital copy and you want a print copy. Or maybe you only read the first two books and you want the third book. Or maybe you haven’t read any. Or maybe you have a copy of one of the books, but if you win you can give your copy to a friend to read, and you’ll have an autographed copy. And then your friend will fall madly in love with my series and want to buy all the books.

Hey there’s always a method to my madness. And see all the options I’m giving you here?

Anyway, there are currently three Wild Riders books available, and you can read about them at my website HERE.

The books available to win are: RIDING WILD, RIDING TEMPTATION, RIDING ON INSTINCT.

Please note that Nauti and Wild, and Riding The Night are not out yet and won’t be available until later this year, so don’t ask for those books or you’ll just be blowing your chance to win.

So here’s the deal. Tell me which ONE of the Wild Riders book you want to win. I’ll choose three winners on Monday.

Have a great weekend!

Oh where should I start? (Spoilers ahead. If you haven’t caught up to your DVR yet, look away now!)

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Amazing Race - Caite U turned Brandy and Carol because they were mean to her? Yeah, there’s a smart strategic move for ya. *eyeroll*. Then again, using *smart* and *Caite* in the same sentence? I’ll leave it at that. Smart would have been to Uturn players like Louie & Michael who have been consistently leading the pack. But then again, Louie and Michael didn’t exactly come in first last week anyway, so who knows? Maybe Caite did make a good move because Brandy and Carol have been coming in at the front end of the groups every week. Though I won’t be sad to see the cranky duo gone, especially Brandy, who was often very mean to her partner. Still rooting for Jet & Cord, though I do like Michael and Louie too.

America’s Next Top Model - The shrieking, oh the shrieking! Make it stop! This season has been all about the catty bitchiness, yes? I don’t think I’ve ever seen models exercise their lungs as much as this season. The drama between the women is way more entertaining than any of the modeling. In fact, I don’t even remember any of the modeling they’ve been doing. Just the shrieking. Oy. Again, not sure who I’m rooting for. I just want the screaming to stop.

Project Runway - Was fun to see Tim stop off at everyone’s homes, see their families, and get a peek at all the designs they’re working on for Bryant Park. Was sad to see Jay go. He had such high hopes and so did his family, plus I’m not a huge Milla fan. Am really looking forward to the finale next week to see everyone’s collections! Not sure who I’m rooting for. I really like both Emilio and Seth Aaron.

Survivor - JT, JT, JT. You played so brilliantly in your winning season. Last night, though? Dumbest. Move. Ever. I wonder sometimes if they lose brain cells in the jungle. Yeah, let’s give Russell even more power than he already thinks he has. I’m just going to sit back and root for Parvati now since she’s the only one not kissing Russell’s ass at this point.

Still not watching American Idol. Still don’t care. Still not missing it. Though I heard Adam Lambert was good as a mentor. I watched his performance on Youtube. Stellar.

Glee’s back! I love Glee. Missed it while it was gone for however many freakin months it was gone, but it was a long time. Sue’s Vogue at the end? Freakin’ awesome. And the addition of Jonathan Groff as Rachel’s new love interest? Yummy. And Idina Menzel? Squee! Can’t wait for Madonna week next week.

CSI - Loved CSI last night. Love the budding romance between Hodges and Simms. Loved Hodges and Simms playing wanna be CSIs and the kids being able to teach them about loving the lab. Thought the episode was great.

So how was your tv week?

Every year since 2005, New York Times Bestselling Author Brenda Novak holds an online auction to benefit Juvenile Diabetes, a cause near and dear to her heart since her son has juvenile diabetes. Brenda works tirelessly for the cause and has over the years raised over three quarters of a million dollars. Her goal this year is to reach the million dollar mark total.

I have participated in this auction the past couple years. This year I’m donating a couple things. I also buy at this auction because let me tell you there are a cornucopia of yummy gifty items for everyone from writers and readers to those who want something fun. There are computers and tech gadgets to art and trips and purses and jewelry, celebrity items and books, books and lots more books. Anything you want can be found at this auction.

This year I’m offering up a Wild Riders Gift Basket:

Autographed copies of my Wild Riders series books including Riding Wild, Riding Temptation and Riding On Instinct, and an Advance Copy of my August 2010 release, NAUTI AND WILD anthology with New York Times best-selling author Lora Leigh, containing my Wild Riders novella, RIDING THE EDGE and Lora Leigh’s next Nauti book. The basket also contains a Harley Davidson canvas tote bag, Harley Davidson sunglasses, and a Harley Davidson Knit Cap, and other goodies, too.

I’m also offering a critique of a super spicy romance proposal.

As far as other items you can bid on, there are mentoring opportunities available, great book packages, chances to meet with an agent or submit your work to an agent or editor, and just about anything else you can want whether you’re a writer, reader, or just looking for something fun. It’s your chance to support this great cause.

The auction starts on May 1st but you can register now so you’ll be ready to start bidding when the auction begins. Brenda is doing daily giveaways every day for those who register each day, so start registering! The auction site is here. Register now and get ready for May 1st! (I already have my wish list going so I know where to start bidding)

And you can follow Brenda’s auction tweets on Twitter to see the new items that are being added every day.

Go! Check it out! Register! You’ll enjoy the auction and you’ll be contributing to a worthy cause.