Jaci Burton’s Muse

Shan does these periodically on her blog and they crack me up. I’ve run across some really interesting ones on my stats so thought I’d share. These are the search engine phrases people use to get to my website, though some of these I have NO idea how they ended up at my site:

Search engine key phrases

In book guy puts cologne on his balls – not in any of MY books they don’t

Dominatrix pays – huh…I always thought you paid them

wife caught me cheating and she had my toenails painted – that’ll teach you!

his massive cock hung in the sand – bet that hurt

wifes shapely legs – why thank you babe! ;-)

how to tell him you love him for the first time – ummm…how about “I Love you” ???

sexy she males bull – Well. Transgender bulls. Learn somethin’ new every day.

maria is kinky – Way to go all you Maria’s out there!

I saw him naked and wanted him badly – Clearly they were visualizing Wesley Snipes…or Gerard Butler…or Ryan Reynolds….or…well you fill in the fantasy of your choice.

making a living writing romance ellora s cave – Yes. You definitely can!

bound and flogged – hehehehehe….Charlie, was that an invitation?

lover awakened for sale – Yes, by J.R. Ward. On Sept 5th. Go get it. Awesome book!

his cock expanded – I sure as hell hope so!

packed her mouth gagged – ummmm. Ack.

holiday pussy – Does that come gift wrapped?

interesting facts about me blog Shannon – You doing my PR now, Shan?

Jaci: You two are not having sex again and that’s final!

Nic: *Pulling open the shower curtain* Wanna bet?

Jaci: *finger on delete button*

Shay: *affecting pout* Oh come on! This is the last time before the climactic scenes. We won’t get any for a reallllly lonnnnng time!

Jaci: *shakes head*. Not my problem. I’m on deadline and sex isn’t plotted here.

Nic: *snorting* Too bad. As you can see, we’re having it.

Jaci: Do you expect me to cover my eyes?

Nic: No. We know what a voyeur you are. You like to watch.

Jaci: *gasping* I do not!

Shay: *turning to Nic* You like an audience, don’t you? You perv. *Pulls shower curtain closed*

Jaci: Hey! Get out of there you two! I need to move this plotline forward. No sex! Do you hear me? NO SEX!

Shay: I can’t hearrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

Jaci: I’m killing both of them at the end of this book.

The mushrooms are multiplying in the yard. And not just our yard, either, but in surrounding yards. It’s like an alien invasion. They start out small, then overnight they grow epically.

We got new seats for the Harley. My ass is appreciative. And our helmets came in. Makes for an interesting ride wearing helmets. Definitely safer, but my view is blocked by Charlie’s helmeted head now. I’ll have to adjust. And I’ve decided I hate being on the bike on the freeway. Hate. It. Other than that, riding is great. :charlie:

I did pretty good on last week’s To Do list. Better than I anticipated, actually, considering everything else going on. This week I’ve got to focus on word count for A Demon Is Forever. Must finish that book!

To Do List:

1. 15,000 words on A Demon Is Forever

2. Work on workshop for local RWA group presentation next weekend.

3. Shop for Mother in law’s birthday gift.

4. Website updates.

That’s it for me this week. What’s on your To Do List?

September is looking to be a HUGE book release month and I’ve ordered a bunch of them! I can’t wait!

Here’s a few I’ve preordered and I’m anxiously awaiting delivery from Amazon:

Nora Roberts Morrigan’s Cross

Nalini Singh’s Slave to Sensation

Gena Showalter’s Playing With Fire (this one came and I’ve already started reading it!)

J R Ward’s Lover Awakened (Already read the ARC, but ordered the book - this book is FANTASTIC! A MUST read!)

Michelle Bardsley’s I’m The Vampire, That’s Why (I loved Julie Kenner’s fun demon hunter series and this one looks just as fun. I’m dying to read it)

Alison Kent’s The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Writing Erotic Romance

Wow - I have a lot of upcoming reading to do, don’t I?

What upcoming releases are y’all anticipating? Besides my book, Surviving Demon Island? (You know you want to preorder it, don’t you?) :bat:

This isn’t at all writing related, then again many things on my blog aren’t.

But I can’t resist posting this pic because Charlie brought in this ginormous mushroom last night that was growing in our yard. We live on an acre and a half and when the grass grows, so do odd things. Like mushrooms.

Really, really big mushrooms.

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I’m over on Writeminded today guest blogging about Bantam Dell! Come see me!

So the lovely and talented Alison Kent has penned the upcoming Complete Idiot’s Guide to Writing Erotic Romance.

If you’re a published or unpublished author wanting tips in this genre, this is the book to get. It releases on September 5th.

She sent me one chapter as a sneak peek. Planning Erotic Romance: Giving Sex It’s Due. Her writing is crisp, detailed and informative. She provides valuable insights into the sexual encounters a writer plans in an erotic romance and how they must be relevant to the plot and characters and not just dumped into a story as an afterthought. This is such a big pet peeve to me as a reader of erotic romance. There’s nothing worse than reading a book and knowing, just knowing that it’s a cookie cutter version of insert sex scene here. Ugh. Where’s the heart of the characters in a story like that? Sex is such an integral part of the characters, the plot, the storyline itself–something Alison covers quite extensively in this chapter. The chapter also emphasizes staying true to the characters whether it’s story or behavior or sexuality.

I could go on and on and rave more, but I don’t want to give any more away. I’m enticed and excited about this book. I’ve already preordered it and can’t wait to dive in and read it. Because as writers, we’re always learning. And I think Alison and those she brought into this book to offer their expert advice have a lot to teach us about penning the erotic romance.

I would have done better on last week’s list if ‘things’ hadn’t popped up to distract me.

No, not THAT thing, you pervs.

So I didn’t do 10,000 words on A Demon Is Forever. Only got 7,000 done. But page proofs on Surviving Demon Island arrived so had to halt writing to start proofing. Bleh. Been spending a few days reading through my book again.

The really cool thing is I got lost in my story again! Yes, very dorky of me, but I can’t help it. I grumbled and groaned about having to read that damn book yet again, and what happens? I fall in love with it all over again. I guess that’s better than reading it and thinking, “Oh God this book sucks rocks.” So yeah…I like this book. That’s a very good sign.

Anyway, onto this week’s to do list:

1. Finish Page Proofs on Surviving Demon Island and send back to Bantam

2. 5,000 Words on A Demon Is Forever (I have to work at the office with Charlie 2 days this week. Still haven’t finished page proofs. No way will I get 10,000 words this week – sigh).

3. Get some info to Publicist

4. Send in Contest info

5. Write Newsletter

6. Do a critique on a chapter for a friend

7. Finish up an interview and send it in.

8. Type in copyedits on Surviving Demon Island and create ARC

9. Start working on workshop presentation for local RWA group presentation for Sept

I don’t like the looks of this list

:herby:

Edited: But I’m making progress!!!

I am participating in a blogging experiment hosted at Dear Author

To enter the contest, put up this blurb, image, and trackback and you are entered to win the following prize package.

$200 Amazon gift certificate
Signed copy of Slave to Sensation
New Zealand goodies chosen by Singh
ARC of Christine Feehan’s October 31 release: Conspiracy Game

You can read about the experiment here and you can download the code that you need to participate here

SLAVE TO SENSATION
Nalini Singh
Berkley / September 2006

Welcome to a future where emotion is a crime and powers of the mind clash brutally against those of the heart.

Sascha Duncan is one of the Psy, a psychic race that has cut off its emotions in an effort to prevent murderous insanity. Those who feel are punished by having their brains wiped clean, their personalities and memories destroyed.

Lucas Hunter is a Changeling, a shapeshifter who craves sensation, lives for touch. When their separate worlds collide in the serial murders of Changeling women, Lucas and Sascha must remain bound to their identities…or sacrifice everything for a taste of darkest temptation.

Excerpt

Charlie got a new Harley today. Isn’t it gorgeous?

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